Waking up in the middle of the night is something almost everyone experiences from time to time. Whether it’s due to stress, noise, discomfort, or for no obvious reason at all, it can feel incredibly frustrating—especially when all you want is a full night of uninterrupted rest. The worst part? That anxious feeling when you realize you’re awake, followed by the dreaded glance at the clock. Suddenly, your mind starts racing with calculations: “If I fall asleep right now, I can still get four hours…” But experts are warning that this habit might be doing more harm than good.
According to Dr. Biquan Luo, CEO of LumosTech, the simple act of checking the time when you wake up during the night can increase stress and interfere with your ability to fall back asleep. In an interview with The New York Times, Dr. Luo explained that checking the time can trigger a sense of urgency or anxiety—especially if it’s close to the time you’re supposed to wake up. And if you’re using your phone as an alarm or clock, the problem only gets worse. “The contents of the phone may be too stimulating, which further prevents you from relaxing and falling asleep,” he said.
It’s tempting to reach for the phone and start scrolling through social media or catching up on messages. In that quiet darkness, your phone may feel like a harmless distraction to pass the time. But the truth is, the bright screen and endless stream of information can quickly jolt your brain into a more alert state. Instead of calming down, you’re likely to feel even more awake, and even more frustrated.
Dr. Luo advises a different approach: if you find yourself awake for more than 10 to 15 minutes and struggling to drift off, don’t just lie there tossing and turning. Instead, get out of bed and find a quiet, comfortable spot—like the living room couch or a cozy chair. Do something calming and low-stimulation, such as reading a book, knitting, or even listening to soft music at a low volume. The goal is to let your body and mind relax naturally until sleepiness returns. Then, and only then, go back to bed.
This advice is echoed by Dr. Fiona Barwick, director of the Sleep & Circadian Health Program at Stanford University School of Medicine. She emphasizes the importance of shifting your mindset when you wake up during the night. “Thinking about the fact that you’re not sleeping can rouse your mind and make you more anxious,” she explains. “A better move is to accept your situation—don’t resist being awake—and find an alternative focus.”
That gentle reminder not to fight the wakefulness is actually rooted in sleep science. The more we stress about not sleeping, the more we stimulate our brain with anxious thoughts, making sleep even harder to reclaim. Instead of lying there worrying about how tired you’ll be tomorrow, try a mindfulness technique: focus on your breath, think of something pleasant, or even repeat a calming phrase silently. This subtle redirection can help you avoid spiraling into wakeful frustration.
Sleep specialist Luis F. Buenaver also weighs in, warning against staying in bed when you’re wide awake. “Doing this will lead your brain and body to associate your bed with wakefulness instead of with sleep,” he explains. While it may seem counterintuitive to leave the warmth and comfort of your bed, it’s a strategic step—an investment in better sleep over the long run. Buenaver suggests moving to a soft chair in another room, where your mind can gradually quiet down again.
The next time you wake up at 2:47 a.m., try resisting the urge to reach for your phone or obsess over the clock. Instead, take a few deep breaths, shift your focus, and allow your body to guide you back toward rest. It’s a small change in habit, but it can make a big difference in how well you sleep—not just tonight, but every night.
